By Torry Stiles
10. Your company pitch-in consists of seven bags of tortilla chips, six bottles of salsa and Mary from accounting’s potato salad.
9. You discover vegan “turkey” exists and one taste shows you why it shouldn’t.
8. Being around all the young kids encourages you and your partner to renew your vows to never have children.
7. After all the marriages and divorces you’ve given up on keeping track of who you’re related to and just hang out with the ones who drink the same brand of beer you do.
6. Dinner is at 8 a.m. so the aunts can be at the 5 p.m. Black Friday sales.
5. Between the gluten-free, vegetarian, organic-only, lactose intolerant and other diet issues the only food you can all agree on is celery.
4. For the 10th time you have to explain to Grandma that it’s not a selfie if someone else takes the picture for you.
3. With everybody downsizing there are no couches to pass out on.
2. Grandma declared a “no phones” dinner but now the kid’s table is in an uproar because cousin Jade is texting on her watch.
1.The turkey’s in the microwave and there’s a Crave Case of White Castles on the buffet.