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Top 10 thoughts about sending the kids back to school

By Torry Stiles

10. High school kids will be able to save tons on acne medicine.

9. When my kids were in school, we struggled to afford books and pencils. Parents now have to shell out for laptops and a few cases of hand sanitizer.

8. Won’t the person checking temperatures at the door have to go into quarantine every time they find a kid with a fever?

7. Does this mean that all folks who test positive are to be denied access? …. Like me? What about kids? Are they to going to get booted from Mrs. Judkins’ class every time they cough?

6. There are still far too many folks worried about getting football and basketball season started. Calm down, Coach, I’m more worried about the kids scoring on their SATs.

5. This disease is tricky. It’s supposed to take 14 days of incubation but over and over we hear about folks catching it the day after being exposed.

4. … and we thought the head lice issue was bad enough. Imagine when your little Suzy comes home wearing little Marcie’s mask.

3. All you need is one kid every two weeks to test positive and they’ll be able to play hooky all year.

2. With the masks on kids could chew gum all day.

1.Waiting for the first kid to be expelled for “inappropriate mask design.”

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