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Top 10 things in a 2020 ‘Dear John’ letter

By Torry Stiles

10. “We were fine until you took the mask off.”

9. “Quarantine’s over, dear. Time to move out.”

8. “I only loved you for your hydroxychloroquine prescription.”

7. “I’ve found someone who doesn’t mind my ‘Ridin’ with Biden’ tattoo.”

6. “We’ve Netflixed and chilled through their entire show list. There’s nothing left for us.”

5. “We can still be friends and I will keep you on my Friends List.”

4. “My ‘New Normal’ doesn’t include you.”

3. “I met someone, and we’ve been Zooming.”

2. “You coughed last night. I don’t need a co-morbidity.”

1. “You’re blocked.”


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