By Torry Stiles
10. “Three out of five teachers said I tried a lot harder to be good.”
9. “Your socks suck! Bring me some gift cards from Best Buy!”
8. “What does reindeer taste like?”
7. “Does Mrs. Claus ask you if you’ve been naughty?”
6. “The puppy you sent last year got run over by the neighbor lady. Can you run over her with your sled?”
5. “Do elves sing a lot? Is it wrong to call them fairies?”
4. “Last year you brought me a baby sister. This year socks will be fine.”
3. “My babysitter was naughty, and I have pictures to prove it.”
2. “If you can’t bring me a new I-phone can you at least promise not to give my brother one?”
1. “Can you make the Hallmark TV crap go away?”
