By Torry Stiles
10. “Did you put newspaper down for the puppy?”
“Dad. This is 2023. We haven’t seen a newspaper in this house for years.”
9. “I washed my goldfish and he got away.”
8. “Who shaved the guinea pig?”
7. “Cherry Jell-O is a wonderful treat, but Bowser here is a Rottweiler and is not impressed.”
6. “Your Minecraft pig died of starvation. I don’t think you could handle a real one.”
5. “What did you mean when you said you HAD a pet snake in your room?”
4. “There has never been a bathroom door able to keep out a concerned German Shepherd. You will never be alone in there again.”
3. “The gerbils can be in your room with their cage and exercise wheel but let me explain what ‘nocturnal’ means.”
2. “It’s called a Pooper-Scooper, son. Let me show you how it works. … Come back here. This was your idea!”
1. “How can the cat be in heat? It’s not hot outside!”
