By Torry Stiles
10. You sleep on the couch because they’ve crowded you out of your bed.
9. All your fast food bags are dropped into the neighbor’s trash can to avoid the guilt trip of coming home reeking of Big Mac sauce.
8. You watch a three-hour cycle of the same infomercial because the cat is sleeping on your lap.
7. You’ve changed your outfit to please your dog.
6. A depressed goldfish is cause for calling in sick for work.
5. You were ashamed the last time the guinea pigs cussed you out.
4. You know when your guinea pig is cussing you out.
3. There are signs in your house warning guests not to use the phrase, “Do you wanna go for a walk?”
2. The kibble budget has outpaced the mortgage.
1. The neighbors have gifted you with free neutering services from the local vet.
